This is an excellent example of dṛḍha-vrata, determination. If one does not receive the Supreme Personality of Godhead's mercy, one's life is defeated. In Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam (5.5.5) it is said: parābhavas tāvad abodha-jāto yāvan na jijñāsata ātma-tattvam. Unless one inquires into spiritual life, everything is useless. Without spiritual inquiry, our labor and the object of our labor are simply a waste of time.